Pickles by Brian Crane for December 15, 2024

So much for selective ignorance….

When I’m old, I’ll use the Black Adder cunning plan of annoying people by pretending that I’m deaf.

What? WHAT?

My wife got new hearing aids and the were streets ahead of her old ones. I thought, “Great, now I don’t have to constantly repeat myself.” Then she discovered that they were Bluetooth capable and now I have to repeat myself because she’s listening to stuff on the web constantly.

Earl didn’t get the model with the optional noise filter!

Spouse leaves her $multi-thousand hearing aids in the charging station about 165 hours per week (all but 3). And then barks at me for not spending money on a set for myself. I AM getting deaf. But I know I’d hate having them in my ears: I hate ANYTHING in my ears.

Be glad you have them Earl, I have found people hate when they have to repeat themselves !

You should have paid the extra money to get selective hearing aids.

No more selective hearing, Earl!

Both of us need them, plus sometimes we forget certain words, people would die laughing at us when we have a conversation.

When my BIL got his hearing aids, sometimes he’d turn them down, it was overload.

Take them back and have them detune the frequency of her voice.

I’m at the point where I am occasionally having to ask people to repeat things, mostly because they mumble, talk too fast, or maybe I’m just a bit deaf. But I think back a few years when I had cataract surgery, and for the first time in my life I could see, when I took a shower, or swam in the pool! But I miss the times when I could just take off my glasses and the world would dissolve into a misty fog; very relaxing. Of course, as noted, with hearing aids you can take or turn them off…

My hearing is getting worse too, I couldn’t hear Opal say “please”.

The cat must have deposited a hairball on the floor. That’s the only thing HE’S good for.

It’s the price of progress, Earl.

He hates them only when Opal needs him to do something….aaaaaacckk!

Yeah…….. I HEAR YA.!!!

You tel ‘em Earl……

With a wife like Opal, Earl should invest in heavy duty earplugs.

Hey Opal, how about putting a “please and thank you” at the end of that order. Earl don’t need hearing aids for hearing that. Opal could use a muzzle though.

As Thomas Sowell says there are no solutions only tradeoffs

Yes, pretty much a universal opinion. Silence being golden, and all.

I’ve thought about getting them but only if I could tune out unnecessary noise: like loud exhausts, thumping music, and Opals.

I have had hearing aids for years, but I don’t wear them because can’t tolerate any thing in my ears. Waiting for a custom set that just sets on my ears like head phones. And of course they are Bluetooth.

So Earl has needles in his back? ( I know, I know) …

joannie mitchell lyrics.. “don’t know what you’ve got, till it’s gone, paved paradise, put up a parkin lot.”

My phone has blue tooth which causes confusion when other people try to use it. I also have problems is someone tries to ring me when I’m not using my hearing aids.

Comedian Josh Johnson has a routine about his buddy’s granddad’s hearing which is extremely relevant to this comic’s theme

www. instagram. com/ joshjohnsoncomedy/ reel/ C560s0wgo_o/? hl=en

Pros and cons of technological advances.

Selective hearing has no cure Opal. My hearing aid does isolate outside noises/conversations but if someone calls me past a certain distance and talks I tell them to come closer or I move closer to them because their voice would sound distant and unintelligible.

An older man was telling another that he has just gotten a new pair of hearing aids. “I can hear people talk from across the room, I can hear music play, I can even hear the birds chirp again!” His friend says…“Thats great, what kind is it?” The first guy looks at his watch and says…“Four fifteen.”

what are the spikes coming out of their backs please?

What are those lines (spikes?) on their backs supposed to be?