Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 20, 2023

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    BasilBruce  11 months ago

    How many people went with “Hurry up, January”?

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    Hello Everyone  11 months ago

    StarBitter Coffee! StarBicks is pretty cool too.

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    BE THIS GUY  11 months ago

    “Oops, I forgot to get something for your sister.”

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    Gent  11 months ago

    Not dreenk at steenky StarBAHs and you be cheerfuls.

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    enigmamz  11 months ago

    “Do you want rum/room?”

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    tudza Premium Member 11 months ago

    Hey now, I got to do my Minnie the Moocher using my new Tuvan throat singing voice at an office Christmas party. It was the best.

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    orinoco womble  11 months ago

    My favourite is “Doing Christmas on Our Own This Year and Loving It!”

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    Imagine  11 months ago

    Just an espresso with two slices of toast with English lime marmalade, and I’m happy.

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    iggyman  11 months ago

    I’ll go with the “We’ll do more in ’24”!

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    markkahler52  11 months ago

    I went with “Next Year’s Election Year.” (It was that or “Suicide Sanka!”)

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    akachman Premium Member 11 months ago

    LOL! Nailed it!

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    Huckleberry Hiroshima  11 months ago

    No wonder you’re so mean.

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    Ignatz Premium Member 11 months ago

    One year, I ASKED my father what to get him. He said he needed a new wallet, so I bought him a wallet. He got mad at me because it was an expensive wallet. “This is real leather. What did you spend?”

    The most frustrating man on earth, and I miss him terribly.

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    ladykat  11 months ago

    I’m with Rat – this time of year makes me actively suicidal!

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    Znox11  11 months ago

    With or without whipped cream?

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    Linguist  11 months ago

    After 3 brain surgeries, and almost 3 long months of intensive care in the hospital, my 12-year-old grandson will be coming home Friday.

    BEST CHRISTMAS, EVER!!!

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    Zebrastripes  11 months ago

    What happened to being positive?

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    Ellis97  11 months ago

    How about “Retail Workers Deserve Some Appreciation?”

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    oakie817  11 months ago

    remember it’s @ before # except after $

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    DaBump Premium Member 11 months ago

    Does Mr. Pastis need a hug?

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    aerotica69  11 months ago

    Look, give me a hot chocolate with a peppermint stick in it. Done and done.

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    Kaputnik  11 months ago

    How about “Is it really that hard to make your own darn coffee?”

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    Guido San  11 months ago

    Because you paid $6 for a coffee Rat.

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    uniquename  11 months ago

    It must have a very bitter taste.

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    WCraft Premium Member 11 months ago

    Sadly it is true and not funny. Depression spikes during this holiday. Find somebody who will be alone and make them part of your celebration.

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    del_grande Premium Member 11 months ago

    Do what I do – don’t bother going to office Christmas parties (well, unless it’s something like a “Christmas” Pot Luck lunch at work).

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    Tetonbil  11 months ago

    Christmas hint, Dad just wants time with you. Best gift ever!

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    Sir Isaac  11 months ago

    I’ll have a cup of misery with a dash of despair.

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    minty_Joe  11 months ago

    The “12 Pains of Christmas” by Bob Rivers is another flavor people seem to like. Yes, let’s all sing that one along, shall we?

    “The first thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me, is finding a Christmas tree.

    The second thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me, rigging up the lights and finding a Christmas tree."

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    Goat from PBS  11 months ago

    With those names, peppermint doesn’t sound so bad now.

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    Bilan  11 months ago

    ‘Why Am I So Depressed This Time Of Year’ is a coffee best served cold.

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    MeGoNow Premium Member 11 months ago

    Why Am I So Depressed This Year? Is that the same as Pumpkin Spice?

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    dwkiser28603  11 months ago

    How you don’t get sued for copyright is beyond me Pastis

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    wildlandwaters  11 months ago

    Wait…what?…no pumpkin spice?!?

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    diegot  11 months ago

    I went with the tried and trusted: “Bah, humbug!”

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    iggyman  11 months ago

    Why does the Waitresses’ song “Christmas Wrapping” come to mind?

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    John Jorgensen  11 months ago

    That wasn’t on the list.

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    zeexenon  11 months ago

    My choice: “Where is the closest NURU masseuse?”

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    Moore 1  11 months ago

    Well in Canada we have Tim Hortons Baileys Iced Capp and Baileys Cold Brew with Baileys Flavoured Foam Just think you go to the drive-thru and get a Baileys.

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    mindjob  11 months ago

    Just an Irish coffee and pretend im at the opera

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    elgrecousa Premium Member 11 months ago

    Why do people get depressed around the Holidays?

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    mistercatworks  11 months ago

    I want the “Just Give Me My Espresso So I Don’t Have to Wait for 20 People Ordering Coffee-Flavored Milk Shakes” and a small glass of sparkling water to cleanse the palate. :)

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    katebofde  11 months ago

    I feel you. I need spring.

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    Indianapolis Smith  11 months ago

    Is that the one with extra rum?

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    eddi-TBH  11 months ago

    Realism is not the reason for the season.

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    Otis Rufus Driftwood  11 months ago

    After Pastis gave us a wonderful Christmas strip yesterday, this was not such a great follow up. I know this isn’t a great season for everyone, but still.

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    Sisyphos  11 months ago

    Why waste time and money at Starbicks? Just fix up a nice hot Nescafe at home!

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    carlosrivers  11 months ago

    Is that guard duck on the Starbicks logo?

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    alantain  10 months ago

    I would have gotten a “Would you stop playing Christmas music already!?!”

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