The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for November 18, 2021

Carbon’s toxic relationship with Nitrogen was an issue.

It was just chemistry.

The family’s so big they had to buy a Sulfur-Uranium-Vanadium.

Valence at it’s finest

Ah, the result of carbon dating…..

“Mom, why do I always have to sit by Methane?”

They really do have chemistry.

And to think, she could have married into nobility. That young Prince Argon was really out to win her heart, but he never got past her outer electron shell…

Together they were poison!

It’s when they got into that swingers group with H that really things started to get out of hand. At one time, it was H3C-CH2-OH all together. They just couldn’t control themselves in that mix. Someone had to throw ice and mixer with them to tone them down.

Of course they were having trouble. They have a combustible relationship.

Must be dropping them off at element-ary school.

Sure a gassy family for sure!

The parents are both purebreds – each made of just one element.

All the kids are hybrids – made of combinations of both parents – it’s a compound situation.

the teachers keep sending notes home about C6O6 because the kid’s so unstable…

They show up periodically…

At least they’re keeping it organic.

"Period"ically she had to endothermic.

I think they needed H and C in the front.

Rumor has it that C is kinda promiscuous. Maybe those aren’t all CO-productions.

All of this “chemistry talk” is way above my pay grade. No wonder i didn’t do well in organic chem!

That one kid CO is a real killer.

Of course, they’re driving a Saturn Ion.

and the they grow up and start carbon dating

Don’t tell me – they had 2 kids?

Should be C and H

Some people thought nitrogen would object to the relationship, but there was no reaction.

Some of the kids go out through the tailpipe.

That Periodic family needs Kotex.

He, Ne, Rn, Kr, Xe and Ar will no doubt be delivered by their chauffeured limousines.

C and O are going home to have a 3-way with H and make some C2H5OH.

Everyone knows the most important ingredient in a good relationship is the chemistry.