Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for July 26, 2014

DiHydrogen Monoxide is served clear or with DiHydrogen Dioxide for added zing. Oh, and it the major component of acid rain, and while healthy in small amounts, when working with larger quantities it requires special training and equipment. And here’s the kicker. There is NO MSDS for this compound.I did a safety meeting on the dangers of this compound and by the time I was done the crew was livid thinking the company was trying to harm them.Idiots, loI

Watch out for that dihydrogen monoxide, it can be very addicting.Once you’re hooked, you might just keel over and die after only a few days without your “fix”.

Watch out! It will rust your pipes out. Dangerous stuff that water. Toxic in some areas!

Why is his water orange? Rusty pipes?

But you’d think with its colour he’d be willing to try it.

Does it come in powder form?

Oxygen Dihydride is just as bad. You should also bewares of Hydrogen hydroxide and Hydroxylic acid.

Or, for a change of pace, have some oxygen dihydride!

When the water’s that color, gimme da wizzkey

…but what he thought was H2O was H2SO4….

A strange brew indeed!

Knowing about the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide since high school chemistry I decided to build my immunity to it. Starting with small sips I have increased my consumption over the years to where I now can consume 64 ounces a day without any side effects.

If it’s meant to be pure DHMO and it is that color I wouldn’t touch it with a barge pole.

I have seen what Water can do to big ships, What would it do to lttle Me.?

Here in Arizona we have nearly cleaned our state of the stuff. Our rivers used to be seriously contaminated but are pristine now.

CHEMISTRY IS EVERYWHERE!

I heard he got quite a few.

I’ve been in places where they don’t even card you for that stuff. I’ve even seen them serve it to children.

Clearly the coloring team did not get the punchline.

I actually think that was a Jaywalking (Tonight Show) trivia thing to try to ban it. And there were a lot of people that fell for it if I remember correctly.

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

W. C. Fields

Could have been milk.

What’s with the brown water?!?

Years ago, as a test of people’s gullibility, I bought several gallons of distilled water from the next door grocery. I had adhesive labels printed saying, “Latex Paint Thinner” and placed the labels of the jugs..With an end cap in the paint department of our hardware store, I loaded the end cap with the gallon jugs and just waited..Sure enough, some people would bring a jug to the cashier along with other painting supplies. Of course, we never actually sold any of this “miracle” product; but, it did generate a number of conversations, along with some laughter from our customers.

I would’ve thought “Water Straight Up” would have served the purpose!

Yes, it comes in powder form when very cold, though it tends to clump. You reconstitute it by adding water.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dihydrogen_monoxide_hoax

I would have thought the bar keep would have given him a glass of water.

Hands up everyone who think the colorist got the joke,,,

Yeah, me neither!

I take mine with a Hydroxyl Hydride chaser!

he never had just water before

What about that 6 formula aqueous H20 mixed with distilled water?

As far as the petition goes, Penn and Teller sent some people to get signatures on a petition to ban the stuff.

Thats correct, its used in the pesticide industry.

DiHydrogen Monoxide, do you know what you’re dealing with? Part of it is what causes fires to burn and spread. The other is a fuel in a Nuclear Fusion Reactor.

DiHydrogen Monoxide is water. Two parts hydrogen and one part oxygen. H2O.