Luann by Greg Evans and Karen Evans for June 25, 2016

You know that phrase, “Can’t read the writing on the wall”? Well…

Nose. Face. Cut off. Spite.

Do you need to renew your eyeglass prescription, Bernice? Do you need glasses, Luann? Loook behind you.

Same way, when I’m looking for the remote. Or I ask the store clerk:“Where is The bread?”, at which point, said clerk says: “Right this way, Sir!”, then proceeds to turn around in 2 seconds…right to where I’m standing.

So, what would their talents be? Or would they do something together like a comedy sketch?

Management & Employees of The Fuse and their families are ineligible (or they would be in the real world.)

“Things That Make You Go Hmm…” (♬)“Turn Around, Look At Me!”(♬)“Tales From Oblivion”“Spies Like Obvio-us”“If It Were A Snake…”“Tou-can Play This Game”“Follow Your Nose, It Always Knows!” (♪)“A Tip Of The Tongue”“Mystery Meet”“Event Horizon”“Ob-touse Company…”“Signs, Signs, Everywhere, There’s Signs…” (♪)or…“Captain Hunch”

Time for that famous cartoon lightbulb to appear over their heads.

Judging from their looks, they could pull a Milli Vanilli and lip-synch to one of the Chipmunks’ greatest hits, in costume, of course.

Since Bernice is a silent film aficionado, maybe she could do a Marcel Marceau routine. Luann has ‘juggled’ boy friends/would-be-suitors, so perhaps she could indeed juggle.

“The worst blind person is the one who refuses to see around” (as an old Spanish proverb says).

They could work up a routine based on the one they’ve been doing all week. Oh wait, “Who’s on First” has already been taken.

So Luann can entertain on the stage. Now what can Berbeice do?

Their one real talent, failing to see the obvious, rarely goes over well on stage.

Bern has no chance for a summer job at The Fuse? With the owners being the parents of her best friend and all of her friends as employees? No Luann. You can’t enter a talent show run by Mommy and Daddy.

Will Mickey Rooney make an appearance?

Hold It, Hold it, HOLD IT!

You’re “BROKE” Bern? How Could THIS be when You got All that “Scholarship Money” and those “Secret College Grants” the High School Guidance Counselors Hide and only ever give out to Their “Pets” and the rest of the Kids Don’t Find out about it until Graduation when it’s too Late?

You KNOW Perfectly Well “What Scholarship Money” Ms Bern-ice! The Money that My Fellow Forum Posters SWORE to Me You GOT, in a rather HEATED Exchange a Few Weeks AGO! And “THEY” would NEVER Lie or Pull Facts Out of the Air Just to WIN an Argument, Now WOULD “They?” Would “They” Bernice??

[GASP!] Maybe, Just MAYBE, “They” WOULD! CURSES! As Denzel Washington said in the Movie “Malcolm X” I’ve Been “HAD! TOOK! BAMBOOZLED, RUN-A-MUCK, LED ASTRAY!!!”

Oh, Wait-Person Oxford?? Irish COFFEE, M’Lad and be Lively! I MUST Ponder this DISTURBING Turn of Events!

(No, DON’T put it on Sukie’s Tab THIS Time! She’s STILL Mad from Yesterday. Put it on Mikey’s. He hasn’t been around for awhile….,

(PSSST! Hey Ox? Wanna make an extra 5 Bucks, Man? Well go over to THAT Table and while COMPLETELY IGNORING BERNICE, Sheepishly ask Luann out on a Date! Yeah, Bernice WILL Turn Lime-Green and Luann’s Head will SWELL 3 Sizes too Big!!! No, No everything will be okay! Old Bernie’s got a ‘Terrific Sense of Humor!’ Don’t ASK Me HOW I Know! Just Go! Go, Go, Go, GO!)

Who’s on first?

Oh, Luuucy…

Who is making the assumption that they have talent?

-Girls movie-in night

-Window shopping downtown (my friends and I used to love doing that in the summer evenings at the college town I lived)

-Evening bbq at a lake (bunch of friends used to do this all summer…it was cheap and fun)

-Watching Game of Thrones together on tv (or any good tv show)

-Playing board games…especially favorites from childhood.

Typing this all out just made me miss my life in my early 20’s. (sigh)

look at the freaking poster!

Ohhhh, Bernice as an Ed Sullivan style MC!

they totally ignored the fact that ox was their waiter!

Reminds me of the summer break I bought a motorcycle, but I had to get a job to pay for the bike, so I spent the whole summer driving back and forth to work at Int’l Harvester and spending the weekends recuperating.

“Lord, show me a sign.”.“Sign, sign, everywhere a signBlockin’ out the scenery, breakin’ my mindDo this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign?”

Fuse Follies, coming to us in another week!maybe Gunther can do magic tricks, with Paris(Tiffany)as his beautiful assistant. maybe he’ll cut her in half….

Neither one of them have any talent, that we know of.

They should get a part time job at the same place a few nights a week, maybe, I don’t know, at the FUZE? They do know the owner…

Obviously Luann would win, because her parents own the place

Boy this is an obvious harbinger of what a lot of the summer probably will be in Luann, the Fuse, and all the panoply of characters connected to it. You could do a Venn diagram, or one with the connecting circles with all the characters and interactions, and all the possible characters and interactions. It builds up nicely to the wedding this winter, which I am increasingly thinking will be the Fuse. Should be interesting.

Wouldn’t Quill be in the show? Might be awkward for Luann.

“I got zip.”For talent. Keep thinking.

The poster on the wall must be waving to them ’cause the brick pattern is different in every panel.

does talent always have to be defined in terms of singing or acting? I suppose it does when the word “follies” is there. Hopefully it will be defined broadly to include all of the arts.

New idea to bat around: what is Les actually turns out to be very, very good at some sort of entertainment skill and enters?

Les may be talented at juggling work and embezzlement!

It has been established that Luann can sing…………but if they sped up the recording to simulate the chipmunks, her voice would very different and no matter how bad Bernice is, it wouldn’t matter. Don’t lean too hard on me, I’m not that creative, the last ice show I worked on….I painted the scenery.

No such thing as a “first annual.” Needs to be “first ever” or “inaugural.”

Bernice says she has “zip” in the last panel. Remember all the weird guesses involving that word that we all had fun with when they were going to “2 guys do zip for 2 hours” ?

Of course, Sukie, but you had to remind us. (kidding…)

Re: Luann and academics-—————————————————————————————I actually don’t think Luann just got by academically, i.e. while at Pitt. I saw her as a B, B- student. She was frequently seen paying attention in class and being responsible at least in her senior year. In 1st year Junior college she always seemed attentive even in that English class that we saw her in. Tiffany is the one who just gets by… academically.

How focussed on themselves the two college kids are!(Is that a surprise to anyone?)

I once saw a sign on a sidewalk, at head height, that said, “Please do not bump into this sign.”

Maybe also “Living On ‘Wonder’ Bread”

Oh look, it’s the Oblivious Twins.

1) Bern- get a job. 2) Lu- watch your back (or at least read it).

Of course we know who will make the costumes