That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for February 07, 2024

“Let me handle this. I have 4 weeks of training at barber school.”

/// Dolf’s tattooed with a name, (not his wife),

so it’s being removed with a knife.

If wife sees, his name’s mud,

but he’s lost lots of blood.

Either way he is risking his life.

If you would just stop sleeping with other men’s wives, you wouldn’t have to pick broken glass out of your as s from jumping out the window.

“Let this be a lesson to you Sven, never argue with your wife even if she is just holding a knitting needle.”

Interesting subjects these Dutch artists liked to paint. What a waste of talent!

The butcher who backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work…

You ask why I am getting a stitch?/

I backed into the son of a b*t*h !

Her truck had no bumper/

When I happened to thump’er/

But it did have a mean trailer hitch…

It’s never a good thing when your hemorrhoids are profusely bleeding.

Explaining taxes

Dude, I know some Chinese. Thats not what it says.

Look I can keep scrubbing, but it ain’t gonna come off.

Bub, you may want to step back. Bad burritos last night.

I thought that was painting of three stooges with Larry letting his hair down.

The sentence was lashes at the whipping post, but the executioner misunderstood and tied me to the wiping post.

Were you the one that put a ketchup packet under the toilet seat?

’Geez! I always thought “up the wazoo” was only an expression!’

“I think his hemorrhoids are a little lower down, Doc.”

Well, Roberto certainly learned his lesson the hard way. When the Marquis de Sade’s wife hired him to work her Hen Party, he didn’t realize that one of her games would be a live version of “Nail the Tail on the Donkey”!

When we are drunk we get the best ideas! If we cut this mole just right, it’ll look like the Virgin Mary, and people will pay to look at your butt!

Yep, it’s a zit. A big one. Let’s call that Dr. Pimplepopper!

Jo Jo the dog faced boy.

“A painter!?! Seriously guys, do we really need a selfie of this?”

I told you this fetish would not end well.

After seeing Quast’s effort, Upjohn decided to go with Norman Rockwell.

“OMG, this is the worst kidney stone I’ve ever seen.”

“You see that? That’s the shade of brown I want for the leather upholstery. "

“I asked the doctor what to do about his rattlesnake bite. He said to suck the venom out.” “Oh, well I’d like a second opinion.”

Celebrating Pride Month – moments from pre-bathhouse history caught on canvas/ wood…

“This ain’t the first time I’ve seen someone accidentally shoot themselves in the butt, but it’s the first time I’ve seen it happen with a bow and arrow.”

Another painting that raises the question, Of all the subjects the guy can paint, how in hell did he come up with this?

First chiropractor curing neck pain.

So you did not believe her when she said that was a pin cushion……..

A Quack at Work in a Barn: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:1630s paintings" Wikimedia 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, Ecosia and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found and once there find the text string Quast, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this roughly US letter size painting. 

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3266 (February 7, 2024) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger, if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. Only work by him used here so far.

Dutch acupuncture.

“I’ve looked everywhere else for my watch…”

Yes Dr., i know it’s a dozen roses but read the card.

“A Quack at Work in a Barn,” ca. 1635

Interesting to know that the term quack has been around longer than I realized.

“I know what your wife said, but, I’ve been looking for 5 minutes, and I still can’t find your head.”