Crankshaft by Tom Batiuk and Dan Davis for June 21, 2024

Is it just me, or do the 69-year-old Cindy Summers/Winkerbean/Jarre’s facial features look totally flattened against the front of her skull in Panel Two?

Oh, and also…EEENNNNNDDD!!!

Yeah, right, Mason Jaw, you hate the franchise that made you more than a G-list actor in movies that appear on channels with four-digit numbers, but you’d totally inflict your character’s name on your son. Or, worse, the name of Marianne Withered’s character on your jealous wife’s daughter.

“Or alien names? Or gender-irrelevant names? Or are just going to whistle and say ’Here, puppy!”

“…Because those are our Safe Words!” By “Batuik and DAVIS.” What does John Byrne think about that art, Davis?

I love the way the Starbuck Jones image stares at Mason Jaw. He’s thinking “What a dörk!”

It’s called naming!

Yawnnnnnn…where’s Crankyawnnnn….

How about Tom or Dan for boys?

Funky is also already taken

I wish I had my own Air Wing of B-2, B-21 and B-52 Bombers so I could carpet-bomb the whole place and reduce Centerville to smoldering ashes..

“And how is it that you can be pregnant when you’re almost 70 years old?”

“I was thinking of names that were popular when I was a young girl. Names like Prunella or Hezekiah.”

Which “Starbuck” did you like better: Dirk Benedict or Katee Sackhoff?

For some reason, GC is showing me a blank gray rectangle where the comic should be.

Not that I am complaining.

How about “kid of dumb and dumber”?

A challenge: to all “fans” of Funky Winkerbean – what about this particular comic is funny, enjoyable, clever, or worthy of any sort of praise?

the circumstances of the birth will dictate the name.

In FOR BETTER OR FOR WORsE, they named the kid “April” because of HOW she got into t he world….

Tune in tomorrow when the ET reporter asks Masone, “If you were a tree, what tree would you like to be?”

(begin sarcasm) Thanks for sharing this with us, Tom. It has been… um… a real pleasure to read. You’re a real… um… interesting guy. (end sarcasm)

maybe the popcorn will cause food poisoning

Hey, Cindy got to speak today. I mean, it was just one sentence to set up a man for the “punchline”, but still, more than she’s gotten in a month.

Curious about her looks. Did TimeMop© take her into the future and get her brain transplanted into a 30-year-old body? Only possible explanation.

Can’t copyright a name, says Mr. Starbuck from Moby Dick.

Hate to tell you, but Moon Unit and Dweezil have already been taken as well by another space head.

Although we aren’t shown the entire sign, we are BLUDGEONED OVER THE HEAD AGAIN with a reminder that this garbage is about “STARBUCK JONES III: THE RISE OF THE BANDELORIANS”! Starring Mason Jarre Jarre Stinks!

When are we ever going to see some Crankshaft comics. These story line lately are like a root canal. Not worth reading anymore.

Anyone named their kid Nevidia yet? Guess that could go for either gender.

The whole thing is flat. . . .

Cindy; “they still wouldn’t be”.

Hey, Mason, what about “Starbrick?”

Reporter: What are you naming the kid?

Masone: If it’s a boy, either Thomas, Eric, Daniel, Stephan, Addison, Chester, Joseph, Frank, Nicholas, Terry, Lincoln, Brian, Richard, Charles, Gerry, or John. If it’s a girl, then Catherine, Heather, Olivia, Angel, Alexandria, Karen, June, Marianne, Holly or Jessica.

After killing his comic strip, the least you can do is name the kid ‘Ed’ after Crankshaft.

Alternates: How about “Xenon the Starslayer”? “The Inedible Pulp”? The subterranean? Atomic Ape? Zanzibar?

Call her “Interchangeable Blonde #5” if it’s a girl.

“If it’s a boy, Les. If it’s a girl, Les. Also, we’ll be giving the child away to a local resident.”