Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for June 12, 2021

Will he have a pillow fight if someone tries to break in?

This won’t end well; the bad guys will beat the stuffing out of him.

I’d be laughing so hard at him I’d not break in.

Can’t afford Guard Duck

What does the pillow man offer in payment?

Is pillow man that guy who says the craziest things about politics?

As long as it’s not the “My Pillow” guy.

Yeah, what happened to Guard Duck?

If this were a political cartoon, then I’d make some kind of joke about The Pillow Guy fearing nothing because he’s completely disconnected from reality, and thus able, I presume, to imagine himself invulnerable to whatever happens.

If that’s the Mypillow guy then they’re just asking for trouble.

Don’t let them get you down Pillow Man! Stay on the case

I was a security director for a bit. One of my guards was a 50+year old woman with a withered arm. She was a good guard.

Billy Joel wrote a song about him, I think.

“Sing us a song, you’re the Pillow Man.Sing us a song tonight…”

Not sorry. I’m in one of those moods.

Mike Lindell could not be reached for comment.

This security performance is far pillow par

He’s a new superhero: Softman.

What (additional) security does Pig need if he lives with Rat?

Hmm. Maybe protection from everyone who doesn’t like Rat.

Is that the real my pillow guy, or his cheap stand in?!

Yes I was thinking that too gduncan58, Where is Guard Duck? Security should never be an issue for Pig.

Where’s guard duck? Don’t tells me the crocs ate him.

L’il Guard Duck probably flew ‘south’ for the ‘winter’ (i.e. during COVID.) He’s probably in Mexico selling his ‘special set of skills’ to the highest bidder.

Whatever happened to Guard Duck?

We haven’t had a good new superhero since Stan Lee died.

Maybe try buying some pressure sensors.

Pastis did you forget you had a character named Guard Duck ? Many comments about the duck ;-)

Pillow Man of the Pillsbury Security Company?

Sleepover security?

Wonder if he likes to cuddle?

Pillow Man will work for a small down payment.

A take off on the my pillow guy?

Dear lord! call the other guy….

Is that Mike Lindell?

Think about it though. If someone’s looking to break into the houses, they’re likely gonna assume that the idiots who hired Pillow Man don’t have much worth stealing.

What happened to L’il Guard Duck?

Is that the ‘My Pillow’ guy? Need better security!

What happened to Guard Duck. I thought that was his job

Whatever happened to “Guard Duck”??? He’d be the more logical choice.

‘My Pillow guy’ Mike Lindell banned from many mainstream social media sites for spreading unsubstantiated claims about the November election. If Trump is saying August, that is probably because he heard me say it,” Lindell told The Daily Beast.

This seems like one of those Geico commercials where they show you an easier way to save money

Shouldn’t that be “My Pillow?”

Did he get those from Mike Lindell?

Maybe the Homeowner’s Association could offer a suggestion.

Guard Duck’s feathers were plucked for those pillows. That makes him feel down.

Waitaminnit. What about Lil Guard Duck?

Send for Guard Duck…

Since Pillow Man fears no one, he must be an atheist.

You get what you pay for, as they say.

Man down, man down! :D

Hey! That’s as crazy as the pillow guy!!

Might be OK if this is the My Pillow man. I hear he’s tough on crime

I wonder what’s happening in the neighborhood to be so dangerous?

He’s unprotected per my pop (RIP) who used to threaten to kick me in the slats.

No, this seems like it will work. Even burglars don’t want to go near a guy who’s that obviously insane.

That’s because his head is full of feathers too.

Mike Lindel, is that you?

This reminds me of gus johnsons “Pillow Guy.”

Lots of comments asking after lil’ guard duck. he is way too O.P.

they should ask Zeeba to borrow Mr. Snuffles…he is after all a stealth assassin…

Emasculate any more of the police and that’s all they’ll be allowed to have for defense.

Oh no Steven, Mike Lindell is going to sue now.

wait, what happened to Guard duck?

Ya get what ya pay for… And this guy is cheap.

good choice

Pillow-Man maybe can take a punch. But for Serious Protection, we need Li’l Guard Duck and his trusty sidekick, Mr. Snuffles!

Guard Duck must have raised his rates

Maybe Guard Duck will be willing to help.

Pillow man, MyPillow man … To-may-to, to-mah-to

Hire the My Pillow guy and many will leave your house alone. He’ll mislead the rest.

what happened to little guard ducky?

There’s a pound of feathers in each pillow. You smack someone with a one-pound weight and they’re going down.

This looks like one of those comics that was suspiciously scheduled.

Where is Guard Duck when you need him?

Where’s the guard duck!?!