Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for January 25, 2024

  1. Img 0668b
    Coopersdad  11 months ago

    Always expect the unexpected.

     •  Reply
  2. Sammy on gocomics
    Say What Now‽ Premium Member 11 months ago

    Religions are for the gullible.

     •  Reply
  3. Giphy
    HidariMak  11 months ago

    I decided to give up religion for lent. The commandment to “love everyone” conflicted with the availability of enough condoms.

     •  Reply
  4. Bluedog
    Bilan  11 months ago

    It’s too bad she won’t see tomorrow’s horoscope: You’re Dead.

     •  Reply
  5. Albert einstein brain i6
    braindead Premium Member 11 months ago

    Your horoscope says: The stars and planets have no effect on your life in any way.

     •  Reply
  6. Wolf
    Mediatech  11 months ago

    One time my horoscope said “Don’t be afraid to confront your true self.” So I looked for that jerk all day, but he never bothered to show up.

     •  Reply
  7. Fox picture avatar  2
    phritzg Premium Member 11 months ago

    Instead of her horoscope, maybe she should have read the weather forecast: “Cloudy, with a chance of your death”

     •  Reply
  8. Th 9
    Count Olaf Premium Member 11 months ago

    There wasn’t any mention of it this morning in the Obituaries, either.

     •  Reply
  9. Army captain bars
    Captain Bars  11 months ago

    … And now for Weird Al’s “Horoscope” song:

    https://www.youtube.Com/watch?v=uXRinzI9Jmc

     •  Reply
  10. 3083024 0826053922 daveb
    Kaputnik  11 months ago

    You just didn’t interpret it correctly. Let’s see. “Now is a good time to reevaluate your life and make long term plans”.

     •  Reply
  11. Bougainvillea
    DavidSharp Premium Member 11 months ago

    For those of us who count on the comics for all our educational needs, there’s an important snippet of information in this strip. When you pass away, assuming you’re headed up there rather than down to the fiery pit, you’re allowed to take your newspaper with you.

    Which raises an important question: which paper do we want to have in our possession when the final trumpet sounds?

     •  Reply
  12. Grandbudapesthotel cr alamy
    Imagine  11 months ago

    But your horror-scope on the other hand…

     •  Reply
  13. Missing large
    WaitingMan  11 months ago

    Edna’s mistake was relying on a newspaper column and not consulting a real astrologer.

     •  Reply
  14. Piggy
    BubbleTape Premium Member 11 months ago

    as gullible as believing in heaven and the pearly gates.

     •  Reply
  15. Gocomic avatar
    sandpiper  11 months ago

    Surpri-i-i-i-s-e

     •  Reply
  16. Missing large
    dflak  11 months ago

    Every day I get up, stare death in the face and say “Not today.”

    What is good about this policy is that I’ll only be wrong ONCE.

     •  Reply
  17. Missing large
    DM2860  11 months ago

    The idea that someone could write up a shot blip that applies to 1/12 of the population without it being so generalized as to be meaningless is absurd.

     •  Reply
  18. Large th
    Nebuchadnezzar Scrood's Tannin Garden of BabbleOn  11 months ago

    Fun thought/thinking experiment:

    Check out the short, interesting, accessible. and fun article and vid here:

    .Org/2023/12/31/1222132825/checking-your-2024-horoscope-astronomy-explains-why-your-sign-might-have-changed

    Still on board? The Flat Earth Society is still accepting memberships.

    https://theflatearthsociety.Org/home/

    From their site:

    “Benefits include a signed certificate, membership card, listing on our official registry and more.”

    Well, all that makes it absolutely undisputable, right?

    And now, to disappear a while down this other rabbit hole….

     •  Reply
  19. 13.2.6lustigavator
    John Lustig (Last Kiss) creator 11 months ago

    Typical Aquarius! Or so I guess. ‘Cause—true fact—I’m an Aquarius. And it’s my birthday.

     •  Reply
  20. 250
    ladykat  11 months ago

    Nor in mine.

     •  Reply
  21. Missing large
    MollyCat  11 months ago

    That’s why they’re called Horror-scopes.

     •  Reply
  22. Img 0964
    JeanLouRocket  11 months ago

    I pledge to give up feeling guilty for Lent

     •  Reply
  23. Missing large
    GreenT267  11 months ago

    Many years ago, in one of my college classes, Rhetoric and Composition. The topic was persuasion and one of the books on the recommended reading list was on the zodiac and astrology. We conducted an experiment in which we took astrology columns published in three newspapers. For three weeks [12 class periods, ~20 students], we distributed lists of a dozen daily predictions in class and asked students to pair them with the appropriate astrological sign. We also gave students sets of twelve zodiac sign descriptions [taken from different zodiac books] and asked them to pick the one that fit their particular sign and write why they picked it.

    Our results demonstrated that practically any prediction can be paired with any sign. Less than 1% of the sign mappings were totally correct; less than half of the mappings were even close to 50% correct; and, the results didn’t improve much over time [i.e., mappings at the end were almost as incorrect as those at the beginning.] The results also demonstrated that practically any zodiac description can be seen to fit practically any sign. Without the sign label, students tended to select descriptions with the most pleasing characteristics as their own. Descriptions for Aquarius were particularly popular choices [it was the ‘Age of Aquarius’], although only a few people in the class had been born “under that sign.”

    People lock on to the positive attributes of their sign and ignore negative ones. People are also adept at noticing coincidences. That’s part of our natural learning process where we ‘clump’ things together to make sense. We’ve been looking for coincidences/commonalities /causal connections ever since we discovered fire. What we don’t notice are the vast number of times ‘coincidence’ doesn’t happen. We notice when we meet someone from our home town or someone with our same first name but we don’t make note of the hundreds of people we meet from different places or with different names.

     •  Reply
  24. Dogs 003
    EXCALABUR  11 months ago

    You will never know where and when

     •  Reply
  25. Greg backlit
    mindjob  11 months ago

    That’s because all the horoscopes have already been written and are just being recycled, like fortunes inside fortune cookies

     •  Reply
  26. Missing large
    Cozmik Cowboy  11 months ago

    Reading the horoscope and thinking there’s an afterlife? Doubly gullible.

     •  Reply
  27. Imagescaxtkub3
    Calvins Brother  11 months ago

    “You will receive an uplifting experience today.”

     •  Reply
  28. Kirby close up with poppies behind   close cropped
    mistercatworks  11 months ago

    Gullible people don’t usually go to Heaven. They wind up at a different place with deceptive signage. :)

     •  Reply
  29. Missing large
    Mary Sullivan Premium Member 11 months ago

    Wonderful.

     •  Reply
  30. 6c86edf7 1aae 40d2 aa1b 90a21a49b8f2
    JosephShriver  11 months ago

    “Horoscopes may be wrong, but those fortune cookies cookies sure are accurate “ , a quote I recall hearing one some years ago

     •  Reply
  31. Faceapp 1644876092669
    Azoth888  11 months ago

    There is pop astrology (the kind one finds in the newspapers next to the comic strips) and serious astrology (the kind practiced by Ptolemy, Galileo, Kepler and modern day equivalents). Comparing pop astrology with serious astrology is like comparing Justin Biber or Britney Spears with Igor Stravinsky.

     •  Reply
  32. Missing large
    Dianne50  11 months ago

    Many long years ago a famous entertainer visited an astrologer on the day of his death and I’ve often wondered why she didn’t warn him. Proof, I think, that it’s all nonsense. Still it’s kind of a fun party game if you don’t take it too seriously.

     •  Reply
  33. Missing large
    christelisbetty  11 months ago

    Your stars knew it was too late to warn you,Lady.

     •  Reply
  34. Missing large
    PaulGoes  11 months ago

    Gullible Travels?

     •  Reply
  35. Straycat 1
    MFRXIM Premium Member 11 months ago

    “It’s best to read the weather forecast before praying for rain.” Mark Twain

     •  Reply
  36. Missing large
    jrlind55  11 months ago

    The whole “Thou shall have no other gods” stuff indicates she wouldn’t even be in this line in the first place.

     •  Reply
  37. Camera1 016
    keenanthelibrarian  11 months ago

    So, what would you have expected your horoscope to say : “Today you are going to die” … “Just get comfortable and expect the unexpected” … “Hope for the best but prepare for the worst” .. ?? The mind boggles. Anyway, there’re only 12 of them (should be 13, apparently) and they’re supposed to be a guide(?) for millions of people.

     •  Reply
  38. Missing large
    Michael McKown Premium Member 11 months ago

    I’m still waiting for a strong, stunning horoscope. You know, something like: 1) You should quit your job today. Or 2) Your spouse will try to kill you today.

     •  Reply
  39. Missing large
    [Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce]  11 months ago

    Horoscopes are fulla Taurus

     •  Reply
  40. Toughcat
    bakana  11 months ago

    I once dated a woman whose Church taught that you would go Straight to Hell for meddling with Horoscopes.

    She Went to church every Sunday.

    She read her Horoscope first thing every day.

    When I asked her how she reconciled these two things, she got very Angry and refused to talk to me for the rest of the night..

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment

More From Non Sequitur