Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for February 25, 2024

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    BE THIS GUY  9 months ago

    The wound is so fresh, I can taste the blood

    But I don’t have strength to leave

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    BasilBruce  9 months ago

    Stephan’s teeth will be messed up so badly he’ll sound like a harmonica when he breathes.

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    Asharah  9 months ago

    Billy Joel may sue.

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    DanielRyanMulligan1  9 months ago

    I NEVER “DREAMED” ANYONE COULD “TOP” MY OLDER BROTHER’S AWFUL “DAD” JOKE: (even though he “claims” he’ll NEVER be a “dad,” as he doesn’t want his kid to inherit my “suffering” from my chronic illness of hemophilia) so, here is the joke that was JUST “beaten” by our hero, STEPHEN PASTIS; RICK: “why do vampires LOVE hemophiliacs so much?” RICK SAYS THE PUNCHLINE: “no “pesky” blood clots in their throats!!!!” Thanks, and don’t forget to tip your waiter!!!! Goodnight, everybody!!!! Dan aka…

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    ronaldspence  9 months ago

    (audible groan) but sure appreciate the effort!

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    hariseldon59  9 months ago

    Looks like not only the good die young.

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    Qiset  9 months ago

    He’s singing my town.

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    mnexplorer+  9 months ago

    OK. Who did NOT sign that in their head?

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    tomevansphd  9 months ago

    Ironically sang by John and Joel (Elton and Billy) whose last names could have been first names . . .

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    Imagine  9 months ago

    Tom is really holding on to his melons.

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    einarbt  9 months ago

    Good one.

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    Concretionist  9 months ago

    Melon, T ⇔ melody? Yikes.

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    Obi-Haiv  9 months ago

    God, but I LOVE the pun strips!

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    franki_g  9 months ago

    Yes, it’s you I’ve been coming to see to forget about life for awhile

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    Cornelius Noodleman  9 months ago
    Strip is one Billy of a Joel.
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    Cpeckbourlioux  9 months ago

    I suppose Pastis just can’t help himself, sometimes.

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    ellisaana Premium Member 9 months ago

    You may be right. He may be crazy, but it just may be a lunatic we’re looking for.

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    Say What Now‽ Premium Member 9 months ago

    I dare anyone to claim they saw that coming.

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    John Smith  9 months ago

    I hate it when I agree with Rat

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    Emjeff  9 months ago

    ugghhh

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    PaulAbbott2  9 months ago

    Everybody’s talking bout the new strip, funny, but it’s bad pun to me.

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    BenesBaker Premium Member 9 months ago

    This one is pure gold!

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    taxidancer  9 months ago

    I LOVE those puns.

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    unclebob53703 Premium Member 9 months ago

    I wonder if you can pay to be the guy with the bat in the last panel

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    iggyman  9 months ago

    Very good one, a lot of thought went into this pun!

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    Doug K  9 months ago

    “Sing us a song, you’re the piano man – Sing us a song tonight. Well, we’re all in the mood for a melody And you’ve got us feeling alright”

    https://www.youtube.Com/watch?v=gxEPV4kolz0

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    WaitingMan  9 months ago

    Pastis must have been on Captain Jack when he wrote this.

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    russef  9 months ago

    Bravo Steph! You keep our twisted minds focused!

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    scote1379 Premium Member 9 months ago

    Puny ! Real Puny !

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    Little Caesar  9 months ago

    Blind Melon Chitlin…..

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    Huckleberry Hiroshima  9 months ago

    Well, I guess the drawings and color are alright.

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    Ellis97  9 months ago

    No comment.

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    storminnorman2010  9 months ago

    We love you just the way you are.

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    bigger Nate  9 months ago

    He didn’t start the ire

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    Caerin Premium Member 9 months ago

    I closed my eyes after the second panel and clenched my teeth; I knew it was going to be bad, but just not how bad…

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    becida  9 months ago

    I saw Billy Joel last night and he did play that song, it was a good concert!

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    RobinHood  9 months ago

    Epic

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    fredroc42  9 months ago

    The harmonica is playing in my head now.

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    MacGuyver  9 months ago

    Stephan must be feeling good after that stretch.

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    JoeStoppinghem Premium Member 9 months ago

    Too tired of hearing that song on the radio. Been played to death. Come back in 5 years I might want to hear it again.

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    rossevrymn  9 months ago

    Hah, you didn’t git me, Pastis.

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    David in Webb Premium Member 9 months ago

    These puns are crazy but in truth I love them. Stephen has a gift to be able to come up with the phrase then the parts then the drawings. Keep it up.

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    grocks  9 months ago

    Excellent one! Inspired many good comments, too.

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    Linguist  9 months ago

    Good one, Steph! It is truly “An Ode to Billy Joe(l)”

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    Willywise52 Premium Member 9 months ago

    I’m gonna puke,but I like it…

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    CitizenOfTheValley  9 months ago

    {Groan}

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    Uncle Jack  9 months ago

    I would love to watch the process as Stephan comes up with these.

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    Jeffin Premium Member 9 months ago

    You may be right. Steph may be crazy.

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    Croc Holliday  9 months ago

    With writing like that, you can Say Goodbye to Hollywood.

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    timinwsac Premium Member 9 months ago

    Pastis is about to experience a “Starry, Starry Night”.

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    Slowly, he turned...  9 months ago

    Was pastis born this way or did it come unnaturally?

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    Lynnjav  9 months ago

    Love that song!

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    chris_o42  9 months ago

    That. Was. Awesome! (thanks for the earworm)

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    KageKat  9 months ago

    I can never resist looking ahead to see what the pun is.

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    Justanolddude Premium Member 9 months ago

    The key to this strip is knowing when to go to the next comic strip. Today’s exit was strip 3, not the last one. Tomorrow should be one showing off Rat’s handy work with a bat but Pastis would not be able to hold the crayons.

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    david_42  9 months ago

    I skip strips that have Pastis at the end, because they are always some sad attempt at a pun, which are sad to start with.

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    DanMoran1  9 months ago

    I knew there was a pun in there but I did not sign that one coming.

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    Mel-T-Pass Premium Member 9 months ago

    The abyss. I feel it yawning in my head now. Or is it just appalled?

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    Goat from PBS  9 months ago

    Piano Man? Is that the name of the song?

    Help me, I’m not well versed in… popular songs.

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    TinaSp  9 months ago

    bahahaha that was my wedding song…..Just the way you are bahahahaha

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    Rasslebear  9 months ago

    Very clever.

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    wuhts  9 months ago

    Not knowing Billy Joel songs???? You don’t know what you’re missing. YouTube the man and find great tunes.

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    morningglory73 Premium Member 9 months ago

    Good one! LOL.

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    AZCoyote  9 months ago

    Ode to Billy Joel.

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    royq27  9 months ago

    Pastis is spending way too much time in the bathroom thinking this stuff up…

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    aerotica69  9 months ago

    Billy Joel is rolling over in his grave.

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    Queen of America  9 months ago

    I’m guessing there’s a song in there somewhere.

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    xSigoff Premium Member 9 months ago

    Billy Joel now writes classical music, and he is very good at it.

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    felinefan55 Premium Member 9 months ago

    Billy Joel is playing right now!!! Granted the song in “My Life”, but still the synchronicity is cool.

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    Aviatrexx Premium Member 9 months ago

    I saw T outside of Hugh’s earlier, waiting for his melons to be delivered by his long-haired dog, “Baby”. Baby wasn’t cooperating, so T sang an old Watson/Burnett song, “Come to me, my melon-collie Baby!”

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    Snolep  9 months ago

    Billy was interviewed by Colbert on The Late Show last week and was very humorous. He made fun of Piano Man. Pointed out it was in waltz time and the lines were limericks. “John at the bar is a friend of mine, and he gets me my drinks for free. He’s quick with a joke or to light up your smoke, but there’s someplace that he’d rather be.” He never expected it to be a hit.

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    Steverino Premium Member 9 months ago

    If he keeps this up, Pastis is going to end up in the punetentary.

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    Otis Rufus Driftwood  9 months ago

    Why Pastis, why?

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    I'm Sad  9 months ago

    Billy Joel just released a new single, “Turn the Lights Back On”. It is a nice slow ballad. I saw this on Wikipedia, "The chart debut of “Turn the Lights Back On” occurred nearly 50 years after Joel’s first appearance on the Hot 100, when “Piano Man” debuted at number 94 on the chart dated February 24, 1974."

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    CaveCat87  9 months ago

    You have no sense of humor at all, Rat! That was actually pretty funny.

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    [Unnamed Reader - bf182b]  9 months ago

    You’re slipping, Stephan. I saw that pun coming in panel three.

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    klapre  9 months ago

    This was on Jeopardy a few weeks ago. “Name one of the two ingredients in the drink mentioned in The Piano Man”

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    Ermine Notyours  9 months ago

    Sling us a web, you’re the Spider-Man

    Sling us a web tonight

    ‘Cause we’re all in the mood for a hero now

    And there’s evil doers to fight

    — Weird Al Yankovic.

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    SusieB  9 months ago

    Bravo Pastis! Well done

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    mwksix  9 months ago

    Does this mean Pastis has the hots for Christie Brinkley?

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    bunrabbit99  9 months ago

    i love how i can never figure these out until stephan puts them together!

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    locake  9 months ago

    Rat has his Billy club.

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    cfkelley  9 months ago

    I want to know what Pastis smokes/drinks.

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    Charles & Susan  Premium Member 9 months ago

    Classic Pastis gotta love it!

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    snowedin, now known as Missy's mom  9 months ago

    Thank you, Mr. Pastis! I thoroughly enjoyed that one!

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    JoshHere  9 months ago

    I feel so alone. Didn’t get any of this. Thank dog for the comments!

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    bagholder5150  9 months ago

    Now Hughes can’t leave…

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    dadlivonia  9 months ago

    is there a spare bat available?

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    LaughterIsJoyMuliplied  9 months ago

    And for once I got them all. Thanks Steph (and DUCK!)

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    kwardecke Premium Member 9 months ago

    Having just read today’s Doonesberry. How long until AI can take Pastis job? Seriously imho that looks hard to do.

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    Solaricious Premium Member 9 months ago

    Why is Billy Joel all of a sudden all over the media? Did he write a memoir or something? I haven’t thought of him in years and this is the third time he’s popped up in two weeks!(Considering that Stephan wrote this strip six months ago, this is quite the feat!)

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    Ermine Notyours  9 months ago

    Rat, don’t hurt Stephan. He’s An Innocent Man.

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    stamps  9 months ago

    I knew from the first panel it was going to be a pun. But it was not until the 5th panel that I realized how bad it would be.

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    P51Strega  9 months ago

    YAY, a belabored pun! This is what I read this strip for!

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    BC in NC Premium Member 9 months ago

    Sometimes I take long walks in the woods, sit on a bench by a lake and ponder the big questions such as “What is a real estate novelist?”

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    Snoopy_Fan  9 months ago

    I prefer women with melons…

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    msandman1943  9 months ago

    Horrible, horrible… I knew it was coming, but there was nothing I could do to stop it.

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    zeexenon  9 months ago

    I’m looking for the Hugh Hefner National Memorial annual Centerfold shoot.

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    bigplayray  9 months ago

    Good one Stephan!

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    RSHAFFE1  9 months ago

    Wow! Pastis must have gotten a batch of the good stuff this week!

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    Dillithamir  9 months ago

    Best one ever

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    alexius23  9 months ago

    Billy Joel will take you on a one way trip on the Downeaster Alexa

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    thedogesl Premium Member 9 months ago

    There used to be a comic strip called “There Oughta be a Law.” Can’t say why that came to mind…:_)

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    thomaso1708  9 months ago

    And so it goes

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    markkahler52  9 months ago

    HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!

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    markkahler52  9 months ago

    Already a Favorite from a Classic!

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    patrickab7  9 months ago

    slow clap

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    rgcviper  9 months ago

    Better watch out, Pastis, since Only the Good Die Young.

    Bet he’s feeling some Pressure to not irk Rat anymore.

    Sure—this is another pun strip, but You May Be Right that they’re fun.

    (I’ll see myself out now … ) This one made me smile.

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    awgiedawgie Premium Member 9 months ago

    “Piano Man” was one of the songs I sang during my first ever night doing karaoke. Every time after that when I sang at that particular bar, people would request me to sing it again.

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    sperry532  9 months ago

    Brilliant.

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    dwkiser28603  9 months ago

    FOR THE LOVE OF GOD RAT! JUST DO IT ALREADY

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    pamela welch Premium Member 9 months ago

    G R O A N — OMG, OMG — So damm funny

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    soaringblocks  9 months ago

    Stephen! you’re an amazing artist! You make me laugh heartily!

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    JPuzzleWhiz  9 months ago

    One of Stephan’s best!

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    Tom in WV  9 months ago

    All that was missing was a reference to the Italian Restaurant — you know, the song about that lovely girl Brenda Renetti.

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    awcoffman  9 months ago

    Just when you thought Pastis couldn’t possibly stoop any lower…..

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    wildlandwaters  9 months ago

    C’mon, Rat… we’re all with ya!

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    gary.eddings4157 Premium Member 9 months ago

    Oh my dear Lord…Punday Sunday…sometimes it just turns out that way

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    storminnorman2010  9 months ago

    Rat’s last line should have been “Goodnight Saigon” (another Billy Joel single.)

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    DamnHappyChappy  9 months ago

    Tom should have been named Dom or Dan or Dave etc. a Melon, D.

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    [Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce]  9 months ago

    One I heard—

    Use the word “punctilious” in a sentence.

    I know two sisters,Millie and Tillie. Millie is all right, but you have no idea how punctilious.

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    wordsmeet  9 months ago

    Smart: two Billy Joel songs commemorated here.

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    Soo5002  9 months ago

    Oh Lord, this is one of the best that’s come along in some time. A+

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    da_villa  9 months ago

    How very clever!

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