Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 11, 2024

Pig, she’s not worth talking to.

Pig: “Thanks, I’m sure it has a better shape than you have.”

If someone came up to me and asked me if I know what time it is, I would just say, “Yes.”

My mates chat up line was “How did you get such a fit body?” after she had explained, he would just say “I was hoping buying you a drink would do the trick”. It worked on a couple of occasions

As the group Chicago ask, Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?

Pig dodged a bullet there as they say.

You’re better off not knowing the crabby girl, Pig!

Time for you to buy a watch!

Used to be that, if you wanted to know what time it was, you’d look at your watch, and if you wanted to make a phone call, you’d use your phone. Now, if you want to know what time it is, you look at your phone, and if you want to make a call, you use your watch.

“With that kind of attitude, ma’am, don’t expect ANYONE to save your life from disaster. Good luck with that.”

it worked for me about 30 years ago. Good thing I remembered to take off my watch first.

Considering the way Pig seems to be staring at her chest in panels 2 and 3, I expected her to say something quite different (although still using the swear word).

“And you better start swimming or you’ll sink like a stone. For the times they are a-changin”

Grawlix = Smart

I actually forgot to bring my phone with me the other day when I went out for a few hours. Felt a bit strange, but somehow I survived.

But if I want to know what time it is, I look at my watch. Quicker than hauling my phone out of a pocket, even if I remembered to bring it with me.

Boy, talk about rude.

Considering her response, Pig is better off.

I always thought Pig was in a relationship with Pigita?

WHOA! Totally uncalled for, lady! He just asked you a question!

Nah, times didn’t change, they’ve always been rude.

“I said “Typical Nasty Weather.”

Time to walk away from that one, Pig

If she had been interested she would have given him the time. Obviously, she was not.

Instant Red Flag! She saved you a lot of wasted time!

Reminds me of the Dr. Demento song “2 Hot 4 U” by Barry and the Bookbinders. “Just ask her. The worst thing she can say is no.”

Pig should nurse that wound with some cheese.

I have to wonder what percent of Americans could NOT tell the time if they looked at a ‘normal’ clock? Then, to really fk them over, ask the same question when looking at a clock with Roman numerals.

Yes, they certainly have.

and i believe that was Chicago Transit Authority. or CTA or Chicago or Chicago with Peter Cetera or …

Some comedian’s first line: “Hello, there. Can I buy you a house?”

That line only works on people who have a good nature

“Your face is good. I’m-a Soos.”

-Soos, Gravity Falls

Just tell her, " I’m sorry, you probably couldn’t tell time anyway", and leave it at that.

Switching from music to books, I think “Time Enough for Love” by Robert Heinlein is more appropriate…

Another possible reply is, ‘Which time zone?’

A good technique to starting a conversation with anyone is to make an observation about something around you. It can be anything from the weather, your location, something they are wearing.

Try, “Hi there honey, I adore your curves, are you a lady of the night?”

As Richard Pryor would say (As “Mudbone”) “Time for you to stop F-KEN wit me!”

When someone asks me if I have the time, I say yes, but I’m not in the mood.

When the woman says that Pig should look at his phone, she’s really saying that she knows he’s trying to pick up on her and she wouldn’t even give him the time of day.

Does anybody really care?

Time has come today. :)

that coffee must be strong…

A two level pun. Ha!

Pig should have said, “If you got the time, I got the beer!”

I’d say how I’d react to what that rude lady said, but I don’t wanna get banned…!

But which times have changed, Pig? Which times?

“Girls” didn’t use to use language like that.

Fortunately! It was so boring to hear that lame approach tactic.

…and it’s later than you think!

You found a good one, Pig. Think of all the time and effort she just saved you.

But I don’t have my phone with me. (Or my watch!)

I once picked up a girl in a bar.

Then she yelled “Put me down, you idiot !”

I’m not sure, but I think that qualifies as a “red flag”.