Herman by Jim Unger for September 14, 2024

That third option sounds solid

I would throw the cat out the window first and then you’re next.

“We have a cat?”

I would go outside first, so I could locate a safe location to bring y’all to.

the bed

The answer you always give to a question like that is one word YES

I know of numerous childless, retired empty nester couples who would both bolt for the cat/dog and make sure they got out, too!

I’d definitely save the cat, but what do you mean “first”?

I hate those kinds of questions just when I’m trying to go to sleep. There’s no correct way to answer them.

The cat obviously, he can’t turn the doorknobs.

That’s how Professor Schroedinger thought up his famous Paradox.

Whoa! Who are you, and what have you done with my cat??

I once told my bf (now deceased) to grab the cat if that happened. My cat became his cat. Sasha didn’t like anybody but she loved George from day one.

The cat… Next…

Don’t answer. It’s a trick question.

“Don’t worry. The life insurance policy has lapsed.”

Hobson’s choice but then that’s the name of the cat.

He is in trouble no matter what he says.

Cold-hard logic dictates that if he could only save one or the other, he should save the wife because the cat doesn’t cook, do laundry, or help out in other way around the house. Further, acquiring another cat to replace the one that died wouldn’t be as much of a challenge as finding another wife.

If I save the cat first I might have enough energy left to come get you but if I save you first…

Cue Steve Goodman:

♪♫ "My baby came to me this morning and said I’m kinda confused

She said "If me and B.B. king was both drownin’,

Which one would you choose?"

And I said "Oh Baby, Oh Baby, Oh Baby,

I ain’t never heard you play no blues" " ♫♪

Starting 10 minutes ago, it’s the cat, the old bag can burn.

Why you, of course, dear! Now if we had a dog……..

I would save the cat even if I didn’t have one.

With a wife like her, he’d save the cat.

The cat is already outside having started the fire. First thing to save is the television or contents of fridge.

Tricky question. No matter what answer you give….your on the couch

“Give me a few.”

Picky, picky, picky.

tomato/ tomoto

Or yourself??

If the house is on fire, every man for himself……

That has to be a rhetorical question. If the cat doesn’t save itself first? The cat, of course.

My fishing equipment.

In my house it would be his golf clubs. :-))

….the TV.

The house.

what makes this worse, is that its 2 AM!

My second wife knew better than to even ask.

Looking at her, that’s a tough question, Ha!

Looking at her, I’d save the cat then use her to put out the fire!

The cat for sure, my roommate should be able to find the door all by himself.

George Costanza would save himself.

Whichever one nags him the least

No brainer here…the cat, of course.

Me, and by ‘me’ I don’t mean you.

Goes without saying- -the cat. Here it’s the dog.

The answer is simple, if you want to go to sleep.

Pretend you’re asleep. Better yet, run away. There’s no way to win this argument. RUUUUNN! GET TO THE CHOPPAH!!

The dog.

Before or after the golf clubs?

Tell her to get out, then find the cat and save it.

“Me own self. Ya got yerself in, ya can get yerself out…”