Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for November 27, 2024

Sorry Calvin. Dad used those end pieces for his sandwich.

Calvin can do it himself if he does not like the way mom makes his sandwiches

You should’ve been more careful choosing parents, Calvin

Yup. Watterson was ahead of his time.

Well Calvin, you have two choices for lunch: take it or leave it.

The knife put her off.

Surprised he likes the heels, I like them for toast

She’s your Mom not your Maid, Calvin.

How about something other than jelly??

I hope that is better than my bologna with a thin smear of mayo. No cheese or lettuce despite my asking for 12 years. Oh, and 2 cookies and an apple. Whole, not cut. And I wasn’t allowed to fix my own lunch either.

And your complaint achieved ?

Cal is allowed to express himself freely – get things off his chest. Mom lets him vent without arguing. Saves a lot of wear and tear on the nerves.

What, he didn’t check before leaving the house?

He’s such a b itch.

I’ve never understood how come kids have a sandwich with peanut butter and jelly as lunch !!! It’s simply not balanced. Too much fat and sugar, no protein. À Nice ham and swiss cheese sandwich with lettuce and just a Little bit of butter spread on the bread and here we go ! Just as easy. Much better taste too. And you can vary it with turkey and chicken slices. Replace lettuce with tomato slices, and the swiss cheese by cream cheese. So many possibilities, all more tasteful and healthier than peanut butter and jelly !

He takes a knife to school he won’t have to worry about school lunches.

Sammich like this is build character, see.

The classic parental comeback: Be happy you have a sandwich at ALL.

Don’t think of it as jelly soaked bread, but rather, worm gut soaked bread. Oh, and offer Suzy a bite.

Supriiiiiiiiiiiise! (Not!)

make your own lunch then.

This ain’t a gourmet kitchen, Calvin.

Very reasonable requests. She hates you, Calvin. Leave out the “got it” and be nicer as you state things. Probably won’t work, but it’s worth a try.

The ends, or heels as we call them, usually go to the birds

Here’s some advice, Mr. Bossy-Whiny… MAKE YOUR OWN KRUTAKIN’ LUNCH!!

…….like Moses crying in the wilderness!!!!!

Put peanut butter on both pieces of bread. That stops the jelly from soaking into the bread.

And again, and again …

You are not the boss of your Mother, Calvin.

Hard to get good help, huh Calvin.

Just can’t find good service these days…

Just using the ends of the loaf must make one heel of a sammich.

Mom’s response: “What does this look like, a Holiday Inn?”

I had a friend I met in elementary school who was a friend all through high school. He ate nothing but ketchup and cheese sandwiches. It’s been over 40 years now and it still grosses me out to think about it!

The end pieces are the best for toast

When my office moved to another building, one of my employees complained about the cube to which I assigned him. So I sent him an email telling him that HE was now in charge of assigning the cubes. It’s the oldest trick in the managerial book.

I had to dismiss him for cause (among other things he threatened violence) months later. In a law suit against the company, he claimed that I discriminated against him by seating him away from the rest of the group.

Fortunately, I still had a copy of the email where I put him in charge.

Word to the wise: when it comes to “he said, she said” in a court of law; he who documents best usually wins.

Gluttony doesn’t just mean overeating – it means never being satisfied if your food doesn’t meet your impossible standards, no matter how much trouble it causes other people. See above.

Yet another Calvin teaching moment…

I didn’t think Calvin could be “grossed out”. Ha Ha

I ate those all through grade school with a piece of fruit, and chips if I was lucky

I remember how the jelly soaked into the bread was indeed kind of gross.

Deeper and deeper …..

Wallace (the Brave)‘s mom would do it, or find a workaround that doesn’t involve arming her kids for school.

Just ask her (NICELY, now) to put PB on both slices and the jelly in between. That makes all the difference in the world!

Sheldon Cooper anyone ??? ;-)

Calvin’s lucky that mom didn’t tell him to make his own lunch!

Did he grow up to invent “Lunchibles”?

So make your own lunch.

Calvin was the archetypical symbol of entitlement… at least until the last 10 years or so.

I guess I’m the ONLY one here to agree with Calvin.

I love the loads of love apart from jelly packed by mom’s in those tiny lunch packages for the kids.

Thin layer of PB on both slices. Jelly in the middle. Problem solved!

The bigger question, why is Susie still eating lunch with him?

When you are old enough to order your lunch, you are old enough to make it.

my mom made us PBJ, but only when we were home to eat it. when she made it for school it was only PB to avoid that jelly soaking into the bread. maybe layer one side with PB and the other side with PB and jelly in the middle. would that keep the bread from getting soggy?

I love his notion that Mom should buy five loaves of bread every week during the school year so that he can have five “proper” sandwiches during the week.

If Mom suggested that he make his own lunch, I bet he’d be like Mike Patterson, who one day gave his mother Elly a whole list of things to put in his lunch. “Michael, you have time to make your own lunch!” “WHAT?” …..“So what did he pack?” “A bun and an apple.”

When my boys was Calvin’s age I did pack their lunches with PB&J, fruit, etc and both my boys told me “they want a change” so brazenly made them grown-up meat sandwiches with fruit and got the biggest smiles from them, after that.

This reminds me of something that happened back in the ‘90s. I was a preschool teacher, and we had an outdoor picnic in the school’s biggest playground. One of the moms offered me a sub sandwich. She said her kids wouldn’t eat it because the bread got a little soggy. That sandwich was delicious! And let me tell you…if someone had offered me a sandwich just like that when I was a kid, there’s NO WAY I would have turned it down!

Refusing to eat a sandwich because the bread’s a little soggy, or complaining about a sandwich because “the jelly had soaked into the bread”…really?!

and I thought Sheldon was a picky eater

My mother fixed lunch for five kids during the time I and those 4 sibs were all in grade/high school (Gretchen was already off to college). And she made each of them according to each kid’s personal preference (within reason… and it was HER choice of what that meant). Jack wanted ketchup on one side and mayo on the other, with lunch meat adjacent to the may and the cheese on the ketchup side, lettuce between cheese and meat. Molly wanted just mayo, lettuce and lunch meat but NOT salami. I wanted mustard, mayo and slices of pickles with cheese and any lunch meat (except liverwurst… which Mom didn’t buy anyway) and lettuce. Henry and Ted got whatever it was: They were enough younger that I didn’t see their lunches being made: They took a later-in-the-day school bus and she did theirs after ours. We did occasionally get PB&J sandwiches, cream cheese and chopped black olives sandwiches or my personal favorite: hot dogs split lengthwise and broiled w/ a bit of barbecue sauce†: Four half weiners to the sandwich, enough BBQ to dribble a bit when eaten. Yumm! She also made meatloaf sandwiches if there happened to be left over meatloaf (quite rare with three of us in high school at the same time, each eating like starved bears). I always wanted something else… and often got a PB&J or lunch-meat and cheese on those days. To me, meatloaf that’s excellent when served hot is greasy and unpleasant when cold. But if you must, then plenty of ketchup and mustard.

† Her home-made BBQ sauce: 3/4 cup ketchup, 1/4 cup mustard, 1/4 cup brown sugar and “enough” lemon juice. Stir together until the brown sugar lumps are not big. Spread with back of the spoon you use to ladle it out of the bowl. I later learned that a friend made broiled “Chicken Sum How” (spoken sing-song) using the same recipe… but replace the lemon juice with soy sauce.

Nah, just make Calvin a nice jelly sandwich with a couple of big slices of liverwurst to protect the bread.

picky!

She doesn’t trust you with a knife, even if it is plastic.

When Mom & Dad were first married, Mom grabbed the heel. Dad said that you ate that last because it helped the loaf stay fresh. Apparently, that wasn’t an issue when she was at home with her mom, dad and five sisters…

Simple. Make your own lunch.

Then you can have offal every day of the week!