I had a professor that stated “Brewing was the beginning of civilization.” It required a stationary population to cultivate grain which would then ferment. It’s still a popular theory.
Some money? Actually I read somewhere that in all the human settlements in history, virtually the first thing ever invented was alcohol; a number of South Pacific nations have Kava, and they’ve been around for a while. Beer is thought to have been invented by the Sumerians around 8,000 BC and the original brewers were women. The Sumerians also had a goddess of beer, Ninkasi.
“Ladies, Night” rings more and more Neanderthal, and therefore fitting for this context. (California, Maryland, Pennsylvania and Wisconsin have ruled that ladies’ night discounts are unlawful gender-based price discrimination under state or local statutes.)
One theory of the origin of civilization is that guys wanted a steady supply of brewskis, and so developed agriculture to have an adequate supply of grain to ferment. This is known as the Beer Theory. (Competing theories are the Wise Woman Theory, Mutant Grain Theory, and Religion Theory. These are not mutually exclusive. It could be the women recognized the potential for agriculture so their guys would have beer and stay out of their hair, for example.)
Captain Obvious tells us the pivotal moment in the brewing industry was hiring a trans woman as an advertisement. Should have stuck with “Dilly! Dilly”.
Frank Zappa: “In order to be a real country, you have to have a beer and an airline. It would help if you had a couple of nuclear weapons or something, but first you need the beer.” (This from a man who didn’t drink.)
After scrolling through the comments I have little to offer. My first thought was beer, glasses, and waitresses. I liked the comments about beer/alcohol being indicative of civilization.
The first alcoholic beverage was probably mead. Under the right circumstances, honey will ferment with no help. Rotten fruit has a low proof and humans are actually resistant to alcohol to a degree. Protohumans might have gotten buzzed on bad fruit, but eventually more of a kick was needed.
C about 1 year ago
Maybe some fermented mammoth milk for a start
sirbadger about 1 year ago
They need 2 things: 1. Beer, and 2. Something other than hands to pour beer into.
Erse IS better about 1 year ago
Dart board.
The dude from FL (not bragging) Premium Member about 1 year ago
One of those bowling machines that are always out of order would be be nice
AllishaDawn about 1 year ago
Karaoke Tuesday
Ubintold about 1 year ago
Bud light, it ain’t.
Imagine about 1 year ago
Peanuts.
Cactus-Pete about 1 year ago
Of course, bar stools didn’t exist for hundreds (thousands?) of years.
MeanBob Premium Member about 1 year ago
I had a professor that stated “Brewing was the beginning of civilization.” It required a stationary population to cultivate grain which would then ferment. It’s still a popular theory.
Enter.Name.Here about 1 year ago
Well, if it’s a “nudie bar”… https://youtu.be/1aifWQ3o8u0
dadoctah about 1 year ago
“And the first guy who says pickled pigs’ knuckles is out of here.”
Cornelius Noodleman about 1 year ago
Root beer!
Imagine about 1 year ago
The people that walked passed it passed the bar and became lawyers.
ArcticFox Premium Member about 1 year ago
They could barley hop to it.
keenanthelibrarian about 1 year ago
Some money? Actually I read somewhere that in all the human settlements in history, virtually the first thing ever invented was alcohol; a number of South Pacific nations have Kava, and they’ve been around for a while. Beer is thought to have been invented by the Sumerians around 8,000 BC and the original brewers were women. The Sumerians also had a goddess of beer, Ninkasi.
dot-the-I about 1 year ago
“Ladies, Night” rings more and more Neanderthal, and therefore fitting for this context. (California, Maryland, Pennsylvania and Wisconsin have ruled that ladies’ night discounts are unlawful gender-based price discrimination under state or local statutes.)
jbordzol about 1 year ago
Scantily clad women!
Intergalactic Hussy about 1 year ago
Leave some barley out for the “spirits,” and come back after it’s rained.
LawrenceS about 1 year ago
One theory of the origin of civilization is that guys wanted a steady supply of brewskis, and so developed agriculture to have an adequate supply of grain to ferment. This is known as the Beer Theory. (Competing theories are the Wise Woman Theory, Mutant Grain Theory, and Religion Theory. These are not mutually exclusive. It could be the women recognized the potential for agriculture so their guys would have beer and stay out of their hair, for example.)
Zebrastripes about 1 year ago
Hops to it!
Count Olaf Premium Member about 1 year ago
Captain Obvious tells us the pivotal moment in the brewing industry was hiring a trans woman as an advertisement. Should have stuck with “Dilly! Dilly”.
The Pro from Dover about 1 year ago
Cliff Clavin
grocks about 1 year ago
… and pizza.
Redd Panda about 1 year ago
peanuts
Carol from CT about 1 year ago
Barmaids. Pool table. Loud music nobody dances to.
erniebob51 about 1 year ago
Beer……..duh!!
vaughnrl2003 Premium Member about 1 year ago
Girls?
DaBump Premium Member about 1 year ago
Sarsaparilla! Milk! Tea, Earl Gray, hot! … what?
sandpiper about 1 year ago
Hadda find some way to relax after the hunt and head bashing. Been that way ever since.
mindjob about 1 year ago
They need some guy sitting at the end of the bar who tells fantastic stories
ladykat about 1 year ago
Beer would be good.
poppacapsmokeblower about 1 year ago
Beer came before bars, except in the dictionary.
Mediatech about 1 year ago
How about hiring some semi-talented locals to provide live music.
1ecrae about 1 year ago
THE DUDE IN THE MIDDLE IS LOOKING FOR THE CAN!
Amra Leo about 1 year ago
A refreshing beverage, maybe?
Honorable Mention In The Banjo Toss Premium Member about 1 year ago
Frank Zappa: “In order to be a real country, you have to have a beer and an airline. It would help if you had a couple of nuclear weapons or something, but first you need the beer.” (This from a man who didn’t drink.)
paulscon about 1 year ago
After scrolling through the comments I have little to offer. My first thought was beer, glasses, and waitresses. I liked the comments about beer/alcohol being indicative of civilization.
cfkelley about 1 year ago
Bar nuts.
locake about 1 year ago
Males definitely invented alcohol before they had clothes or language or furniture.
rjarchuleta about 1 year ago
Uh, beer?!
anomaly about 1 year ago
Smoke and depression?
websterphreaky about 1 year ago
IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY? Out of Cartoon Ideas??
JudyAz about 1 year ago
Mastodon chips.
Jeffin Premium Member about 1 year ago
Take the path of yeast resistance.
alexius23 about 1 year ago
One of the first sign of an increasing social complexity is the ability to ferment items to make booze
PoodleGroomer about 1 year ago
Women and wine. Save the beer for when you run out of them.
The Brooklyn Accent about 1 year ago
Billy Joel playing piano?
Bilan about 1 year ago
“What if we offered half-priced beer to lure the women here”
“Great idea! Just one question.”
“Yes?”
“What’s beer?”
gary.eddings4157 Premium Member about 1 year ago
Whatever you get, it should be on the rocks
Tom Toro creator about 1 year ago
Two-part question: At what point in the evolutionary process was karaoke introduced, and how can we travel back in time to prevent it?
andrew.scharnhorst about 1 year ago
Karaoke machine!
6turtle9 about 1 year ago
Happy hour.
Curiosity Premium Member about 1 year ago
Pool Table
AndrewSihler about 1 year ago
I know! I know!
eddi-TBH about 1 year ago
The first alcoholic beverage was probably mead. Under the right circumstances, honey will ferment with no help. Rotten fruit has a low proof and humans are actually resistant to alcohol to a degree. Protohumans might have gotten buzzed on bad fruit, but eventually more of a kick was needed.
goboboyd about 1 year ago
A horse behind the bar serving wise cracks.
jldewane about 1 year ago
it’s a good start
hagarthehorrible about 1 year ago
Some more glasses.
ira.crank about 1 year ago
Something better than AA.
johnec about 1 year ago
Agriculture, and civilization, are a direct result of the desire for more of that grain you can make beer from.
bakana about 1 year ago
Someone suggested Buffalo Wings, but everyone reminded him that Buffalo don’t Have wings.
donut reply about 1 year ago
A whiteboard to write all the things you need.
wordsmeet 1 day ago
Flat TV playing football (some of you call it soccer but it is the real football).